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Sharing Custody During the Holidays


After a divorce or separation, the holiday season can be difficult. If you share custody of children with your former spouse, they can be even harder. Rather than dwelling on the ways your family has changed for the worse, focus on how you can make the holidays fun for your children despite the split. Read on for some ideas on how to have a great holiday season after a divorce.

Make new traditions

You may have shared lots of traditions with your ex while you were married. While you don’t need to abandon the things you loved to do as a family now that you’re no longer together, trying to recreate the holidays you shared as a married couple might only draw attention to those who are missing from the celebration. Instead, try to create new traditions together with your children. Create new decorations to hang in your home, make a fun new calendar to count down to the holiday, or bake a new holiday treat.

Leave the fighting for January

Kids are very sensitive to their parents’ emotional states, and they pick up on more than you might realize. If they see their parents fighting over who will have custody over the holiday, they may feel as though they’re betraying one parent by enjoying their time with the other parent, robbing them of the enjoyment of the holiday. Fighting with your ex will not only make the holidays less fun for the kids, but also for you. If at all possible, put your disagreements on hold during the holidays.

Celebrate the day before or after the holiday itself

Having custody of your children on the day of a special holiday is a zero-sum game—one parent is bound to lose. If you don’t have your kids on the holiday this year, try not to let this ruin the day for you, and don’t resign yourself to skipping a celebration with your kids because of it. See if your extended family would be willing to gather on the day before or after a holiday, so that your children have the opportunity to spend time with your relatives, in addition to those of your ex. After a divorce, your children need to be reminded more than ever of how much their family loves them and will always be there for them.

For legal assistance with a custody dispute or divorce in Kentucky, contact the dedicated, effective, and compassionate Louisville family law attorneys at John H. Ruby & Associates for a consultation on your case at 502-895-2626.